We talk with Jasmyn and Shakyla about their September 2017 wedding at the Houston Millhouse in Atlanta, Georgia. They constantly had to question, “Will this vendor work with us?” Once they found the right wedding pros, though, their wedding was amazing.
We also give you Cindy’s recipe for the perfect Manhattan, an exercise science lesson from Amanda, and new names for wedding party members: Broomsmen.
We don’t know how to record an intro. Laugh at us and mock us mercilessly while we attempt to figure it out.
Cindy teaches us how to make the perfect Manhattan.
2 ½ oz your favorite bourbon (I like Redemption or Bulleit Rye, but you do you)
¾ oz Carpano Antiqua Formula vermouth
2-3 bourbon cherries (recipe below) + a spoonful or two of that bourbon cherry juice
Dash or two of Fee Brothers Black Walnut Bitters
Combine all ingredients over ice and stir.
How to make bourbon cherries: Fill a glass jar about ¾ full with (pitted) cherries. You can use frozen ones if they’re out of season – just buy good quality. Make about ½ a cup of simple syrup by combining equal parts sugar and water in a small sauce pot and simmering until fully dissolved. Add that to the jar, and then top off with bourbon until it’s completely full. Store in the refrigerator and shake daily or as often as you notice its presence. Very important: don’t eat these cherries for at least 2 weeks! They need time for the bourbon to soak in.
Amanda Teaches Us Exercise Science.
We’ve both been going to the gym. Good job, super gays! The recommendation is lift weights twice a week and do cardio four times a week for longevity. We’ll do it – because we need to live forever in order for this podcast to go on.
Meet Shakyla and Jasmyn.
Visit Amanda’s blog to see photos from their Atlanta wedding.
Post-wedding blues are legit.
What do you do with all your free time once it’s not taken up with wedding planning? Shakyla discovered through the wedding planning process that she’s a fantastic organizer.
How They Met and Why They Decided To Get Married
Shakyla very literally checked Jasmyn out while she was working at Sears. Jasmyn came in with some friends looking for a shirt to go with her hat, and as she tells it, Shakyla basically came over to shut them up. Somehow, that led to following each other on twitter, sliding into each other’s DMs, exchanging phone numbers, and the rest is history. They’ve been together for six years and got married on September 30, 2017.
Shakyla was packing for Jasmyn to going on a trip and when she realized Jasmyn had no travel kit items – and got mad at herself for not prepping better. Getting mad at herself for this made Shakayla realize that this was who she wanted to spend the rest of her life with.
Jasmyn says that Shakyla makes her life a whole lot easier, and is the missing puzzle piece that she needed in her life. Plus, she has that smile. Jasmyn bought a ring and proposed.
They were engaged for a year and nine months planning their wedding, but didn’t procrastinate – they finished most of the planning about six months before their wedding day. Because they started so much earlier, they were able plan on a more relaxed schedule than many people do.
The Hardest Part of Wedding Planning
Keeping up with the information overload! So many people were giving them so many different details, schedules, and other logistics that it was hard to keep track of everything.
They ended up changing venues because their original venue was unresponsive. They decided to ditch the stress of dealing with that and go with another venue all together. Cindy concurs: if vendors aren’t responsive when they are trying to sell you, they won’t improve later. Dump those mother fuckers and run!
The Easiest Part of Wedding Planning
They had a plan and worked their plan. Amanda gave them great advice about prioritizing vendors. After an initial attempt to arrange artificial flowers, they decided… they’d rather not. So they hired a florist. Hiring professionals to do just about everything meant they didn’t stress out about DIY projects.
What They Wore. What Their Wedding Party Wore.
Shakyla had The Dress. And Jasmyn wore a custom-made suit. She tried to buy off-the-rack, but of course men’s suits didn’t fit her curves well. They agreed that since Shakyla was spending a bunch of money on a dress, Jasmyn could splurge on a suit too. They called ahead to make sure the suit shop would work with a woman – and they did.
Jasmyn’s dad ties a mean tie.
Shakyla’s wedding party wore dresses and Jasmyn’s found suits (from the men’s department) which incredibly didn’t need much alteration. Matching the color to Jasmyn’s suit was a challenge. Everyone looked amazing!
Jasmyn recounts how she felt when she saw Shakyla walk down the aisle: she took her breath away.
Dress shopping was overwhelming for Shakyla. When she came out of the dressing room, she knew it was the dress – and her first impulse was to ask Jasmyn what she thought. But she couldn’t since they weren’t going to see each other before the ceremony.
We discuss the potential fire risks of wedding gowns
Cindy educates us fabric content of gowns and doing a burn test to find out what they’re made of. Spoiler alert: it’s probably polyester and it’s not going to go up in flames, it’s just gonna melt.
What Did You Call Your Wedding Party?
Bridesmaids and Broomsmen
How Being LGBTQ+ Affected Their Wedding Planning Experience
Shakyla & Jasmyn used the Gay Weddings section of Wedding Wire to search for LGBTQ-friendly vendors. Still, they constantly had to question, “Will this vendor work with us?”
As they were contacting potential vendors, they had to start by being very clear that it was a same-sex wedding and judge the vibe they got from that question.
There’s a big issue of representation – you’re literally scouring the bottom of the internet before you see anything that looks like you as you’re trying to find inspiration. One reason Amanda stood out to them is that LGBTQ+ couples are all over her website.
How the Wedding Went
It was amazing! It wasn’t without hiccups, but at the end of the day it was an incredible experience. Their wedding party had never met before that weekend, and they became like one big family.
Wedding Planning Resources They Found Helpful
Gay Weddings by Wedding Wire for finding LGBTQ-friendly vendors
LGBTQ+ Wedding Planning Advice from Shakyla and Jasmyn:
Your vendors make or break your wedding day. If you’re not a DIY couple, you have to depend on them to design and execute. So if you don’t like them, don’t book them. Just move on.
Your vendors have to like you too! That relationship is important.
Plan, plan, plan.
Start early.
Use the free resources that are out there.
Don’t fight over the small stuff.
Jasmyn and Shakyla Loved Working with These Wedding Pros, and You Will Too:
Florist: Kelly at The Perfect Posey
Caterer: Jennifer Hartlett at Houston Millhouse
Wedding Planner: Ashley Cudsik at Flower Child Weddings